How many times have you heard about a rape on the news, or read a book about a girl lusting after a boy already in a relationship? With the rape, was it a schoolgirl walking home, or was it a drunk twenty year old who was on drugs? And I'm assuming you felt sorry for the schoolgirl, but were you sorry about the drunk teenager, who was kind of asking for it? Or in that book with that girl lusting after a boy who's already in a relationship, was the girlfriend accused of being a slut? A mindless bimbo that was only with the guy for the status? I bet you can count on one hand the amount of times that that HASN'T happened in that fictional world.
Here's the solid truth: It's slut shaming. And I'm sick of it. I'm sick of society blaming girls for getting themselves raped, and I'm sick of books going on about 'that mindless slag' that the boy's in a relationship with. No girl ever asks to be raped. The schoolgirl walking home? She wasn't asking for it. The girl who was drunk in a bar? She wasn't asking for it. Maybe she just wanted to let her hair down and have a bit of fun. Maybe she had already been through trauma and is wanting to have the time of her life. When we go and say that that girl was a bit of a slut, we say nothing about the boy/s willing to destroy her life. Because the trauma from that rape will scar her for the rest of her life. She'll have good days, and then she'll have days wracked with grief. All because those boys couldn't show self control. They couldn't get their act together. And they failed to see that they need to ask for her consent first.
And that really annoying, bitchy girlfriend? She is not a slut. If the guy you're lusting after went out with her, doesn't that show how materialistic and sleazy he is as well? Or because he's worthy of your attention, he's actually a really great guy going out with a really great girl. So just leave her alone.
I don't think I've done the topic justice, but I hope you get the jist of what I'm on about. I'd love if you could leave your opinions below - The only way we're going to defeat this is to talk about this. Have a great day, and I hope you have loads of fun :-)
El xx
Really good post, El! So true - no-one who is raped is 'asking for it'.xx
ReplyDeleteThank you Beth :-) And I find it so sad that society brainwashes us to believe that rape victims were asking to be raped.
DeleteThis was such an interesting read! Thank you for bringing this topic to light!xx
ReplyDeleteCheck out my blog?
I'm trying to blog everyday in half term?:)
http://hannahporterx.blogspot.co.uk/2016/02/a-z-blogging-tips.html
Thanks Hannah! And yeah, I agree. It's a topic that's been under the radar for far too long, and I feel it's time for it to come to light.
DeleteExcellent post! Well done for highlighting such an amazing topic. For anyone wanting more information, try reading Louise O'Neill's Asking For It- it's amazing! xx
ReplyDeletewww.rosieauthorwriting.blogspot.com
Thank you Rosie, mainly for convincing me to do this! And also try Only Ever Yours, I have no idea which is creepier but that one gave me nightmares!
DeleteAmazing topic! I once found a great thought on this: if girls who are attracted to girls don't do anything without consent, maybe the problem isn't the victim. And it's true, you never see that on the news or anything! It looks like girls are always bad because of whatever they do. It doesn't matter what. And poor girls who have been raped already have enough problems... just leave them alone!
ReplyDeleteonmywayacqua.blogspot.com | Acqua xx
Yes, yes and YES! This is exactly what I was getting at! And thank you for your comment - lovely to hear your opinion.
DeleteWow, you've obviously put a lot of time into this post. I'm completely with you on this one, very well said. xx
ReplyDeletepinksmartiesblog.blogspot.co.uk
Ummm I spent about five minutes worth on it, but it's something that I'm invested in. So many people say 'it's society!' but we ARE society and we have the power to change everything if we want.
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